So anyway, this time- I wanted to be different.. I steered away from asking her about fashion-related stuff and tried to get a little more personal..
What do you love about being a blogger?
Its just being able to get myself out there, not censoring myself. I mean, I do write in a journal (‘cos there are some things that had to be said “out loud” but kept between me and the pages). It feels great sharing experiences and my boring life, knowing that somehow, someone reads it and relates. Its such an awesome feeling when someone tells me that they understand and that they don’t feel alone anymore. Its just being able to be myself and not really caring what the world thinks of me and my life. Although I do post about fashion-related things, which I am passionate about, but I try to just keep it as real as I can.
Do you feel pressured to do/say the right things because you know that a lot of girls look up to you?
On most days, yes. But I figured that the best way is just to keep being myself, to keep it real. I’m learning to balance my entries especially in tricky and sensitive topics like religion, most especially. But I do stand firm by my words. I think its what made blogging so easy after all these years. If you primarily do it for yourself, you won’t really feel the pressure of having to say and do things right all the time. When I started blogging, it didn’t occur to me that I was doing it for others, although I did address readers then, but looking back now, it was fun having to document my frustrations, things that made me sad, things that shaped me to be the person I am now. So I guess, knowing that I did have blog readers who stuck with me since the year I started, its how they saw me grow that they probably focus on, and I am grateful.
I’m sure you get a lot of compliments and messages from other people who tell you that you’ve been an inspiration to them.. And then there are those who choose to leave negative comments.. Has it ever gotten to you and how do you deal with other people’s criticisms?
Yes, it has. I’ve been told many times by my friends to ignore them, and I do- but I can’t really just shrug it off when the comments are below the belt. I keep thinking about my Mom and how she didn’t raise me to be bullied by (mostly) anonymous people. So I try to stand up for myself because its what my Mom would do for me. Its what she’s always done for me. Them bullies might be happy when they feel like I’m affected, but I’d like to tell the other girls who are going through the same thing that its never wrong to fight for yourself especially when you know that you’ve done nothing wrong to begin with.
Let’s talk about looove! “Love is about taking chances”.. What would you like to tell other people who are afraid to take risks for love?
Ooh, I’ve been there and it’s not easy especially when you’ve had that first cut (which is always the deepest). Love is mysterious, and one of the most unexplainable things in the world, which is why its such a beautiful feeling to experience even if you end up hurt. The most amazing thing about it is that it always teaches you something about yourself. One day, you’re gonna look back at all the hurt you’ve gone through and you’ll thank it- because it made you see yourself and love, in a different light. Its like “levelling up”. You break down walls and you get to a better place. Its not easy, but if you know it, if you feel it in your gut that its right- go for it. It may not end the way you expected it to, but always remember that God has perfect plans for us. So with that being said, its just having the right balance of praying for God’s will in your life to unfold. Mistakes? That’s part of it. What matters is that we keep track of where we are and we don’t lose ourselves.
Speaking of love, we all know how much you love your Mom. Tell us about her and how you tried to cope after she was gone.
It amazes me how much I’ve written about my Mom in the past- my blog entries and journals, its still not enough to express my adoration for her. And I always will. Forever. To be honest, its one reality I’ve faced- that I will never cope, I will never heal from losing her. But God is good- He’s always, always been, giving us the comfort that we need to be able to go through days without her. I cry about it, I write about it, I talk to my husband about it. Most importantly, I talk to God about it. I just thank Him for giving her to me as my Mom. I just thank Him for making me feel worthy of having someone as amazing as her to be the person responsible for bringing me into this world. If I could write about her, I would. Its one of the things I want to accomplish, actually. I want to write about my Mother.
Sometimes, there are people who go through a lot of bad things and then blame God for it. What makes you still hold on to your faith amidst all the pain you’ve had to go through?
Its having God-fearing parents. If I didn’t see them have so much faith in the Lord, I wouldn’t be able to stand firm amidst all this. I remember when we found out that my Mom had Cancer, they tried their best to remain so strong. In fact, I almost rebelled, I almost questioned God but they pulled me back. They made me feel like, there is no other way to remain as strong going through the things we had to go through, but to hold on to our FAITH. And it was such a beautiful thing. My father, upon hearing my mother’s passing, initially said- “SALAMAT, PANGINOON. SALAMAT PO SA BUHAY NIYA.” My father thanked God for giving us the opportunity to be with her for a year and three months longer, that He took her as painlessly as He could, because that’s what we were praying for. When the Doctor told us that it would take only days, we just lifted it up to God and said He can still make miracles happen, but if that it was His will, all we wanted was for her to leave without feeling any pain. God has given us so much, more than we could imagine. Thinking about all that makes me cry, and it makes me so grateful. If God gave His only son for us, then I’m sure He knows how I feel after losing my Mom. That alone makes me hold on tighter to my faith. Its all I can do to stay sane.
What’s the most important lesson you’ve learned in life so far?
As cliché as this sounds- its to value each day God has blessed us with, and that we should do things that glorifies Him. Because we can be all that we are in this world, but in the end, none of that will matter. Sure, you can fulfill your dreams, you can do whatever you want, but don’t forget to acknowledge God always and that we should try to live by His words and meditate on reading His book. In that way, God will bless us with even more, especially when His day comes.
What is the one accessory that every woman should have?
Two, actually. Self-confidence and a Spiritual relationship with God. But if you’re asking the superficial side of me, I’d say a Red Lipstick. The one that goes with their skin tones, okay! Red lipsticks are tricky stuff. They do wonders but they’re tricky.
Your birthday wish for me! :)
That you may continue to grow more beautiful, physically and spiritually, and that you may inspire more women around the world because you have been blessed with that gift and opportunity.
**Abbie has moved from 80/90 Lovechild to Kid Gnarly
**All photos used on this feature are property of Abbie Almasco-Bautista
